By Evan H.
Do you know how it feels when you are ready to move on with your life, but it is extremely difficult because you are so comfortable and safe in the environment that you are currently in?
Staff member Ted Towsley finds himself in this position. He has been a part of The Family Foundation School for fifteen years, attending school for three and working for 12, and has made a huge impact on staff, students, and the school itself.
When he was 18 years old, he was sent to The Family School because he was unable to manage his life and had serious issues with drugs and alcohol.
Although he was addressing many of his drug and alcohol-related problems, he still had major struggles with depression and oppositional defiance.“I didn’t know how to manage my life appropriately,” said Towsley.
As a teen, Towsley didn’t like to test himself; he only did what was painless. “Something that didn’t challenge me, I would do fairly easily,” he said. “I had a hard time doing things that really pushed me or didn’t interest me. Also, taking direction from others was very hard; it was my agenda versus everyone else’s. What I started to learn was that other people could see what I needed better than I could, and I had to trust them.”
Still, Towsley found it comforting to have other 18-year-olds who were in similar positions. He developed strong and lasting relationships with his peers that allowed him to help others and give back.
When asked how FFS has helped him to become a better person, Towsley took a big, deep breath and began to tear up. Anyone with a heart could see the amount of feeling and emotion in his face. Then, out of nowhere, he just let it all go, and said, “This school has taught me how to structure my life. This school has taught me how to get in touch with a higher power. This school has taught me how to give back. This school has taught me how to do things that I didn’t want to do, but were necessary.”
Towsley has worked in the admissions department for four years. His co-workers, Jeff Brain, Darlene Karcher and Iris Maclean will miss him very much. They described him as someone with a sense of humor; his optimism made the workplace fun. “His shoes will be very hard to fill,” said Maclean.
Coaching basketball at FFS is something that Towsley will dearly miss. “I like the sport in general; I enjoy working with the players and connecting with them. Coaching a sport at FFS is twofold because there is always that athletic, competitive side, but there is also a character side. If it were just about X’s and O’s and how to play, it wouldn’t interest me.”
Then Towsley began to talk about the reality of his leaving. “I’m going to miss a lot of people; staff and students. I’m also going to miss the place itself because I have been connected to this school for a good chunk of my life (15 years) and to leave will be difficult.” He paused for a moment and then proceeded with, “I haven’t allowed myself to think about it too much. I think that I will have much more intense feelings about it when the time comes to actually leave.”
Towsley knows that this is the next step in his life. “It’s the end of a relationship, but not a good-bye,” he said.
On April 29, Towsley left FFS for that next step.
One of his basketball players, Hunter Ligon, described his experience playing for Ted with these words: “Ted was hard on me to begin with [during the basketball season] and I didn’t like it too much, but in the end it worked out the best for me because it wasn’t easy and I learned from it.”
Towsley’s good friend and staff member at FFS Joe Rogalavich is happy for Ted, but it was clearly hard for him as well. As he was speaking with such excitement about Towsley he began to tear up, and said, “He’s leaving soon, I can’t believe it. I guess I have been in denial about it. Every day I stop back there to see him and the weird thing is that even when he leaves I’ll still stop back there.”
After a few minutes talking about his close friendship with Ted, Rogalavich’s mood changed. He began laughing and talking about all of the good times that they had. From basketball to going to hockey games together, Rogalavich covered it all. “I learned a lot from coaching basketball with Ted, not only about the sport, but about myself. I will never forget that experience. I am eternally grateful for the time that we’ve spent together. He will certainly be missed.”
